It’s not what you earn. It’s what you negotiate II

Last week, we outlined the first 4 of the 5 steps in negotiating with ticket scalpers. This week, the money shot.

THE CLOSE

5. Wait for ONE scalper to approach you. (Never deal with scalpers in pairs, for the same reason you don’t want to deal with two grizzly bears.) He’ll initiate conversation.

And again, these prices are germane to this example only – tomorrow night’s Bon Jovi show in Des Moines. Adjust accordingly for whichever NBA playoff game or Wiggles show you want to attend.

Him: “You buying? Who’s buying?”
You: “Show me what you got.”

He’ll show you the tickets, with cost price displayed. Let’s assume they’re the coveted floor seats you want.

Him: “You can have the pair for $300.”
You: “You can have $250.”

(NOTE: So how can scalpers make money if they’re selling to you for less than cost?

Volume. Most of their sales earn them money by profiting off unsuspecting people who are convinced that tickets for this show aren’t available. After all, there are multitudes walking into the arena at this point. Surely the tickets are all gone, right?

We’ve witnessed hopelessly clueless ticket buyers paying a premium to a scalper when equally good seats were sitting 20 feet away at the venue’s own ticket window. The perception of scarcity trumps the reality of seats still being available.

Besides, how the scalpers make money isn’t your concern. Like we preach about car salesmen, they’ll make their money. Just let it be off the suckers, and not off you. Besides, by coming in late and offering the scalper a $10 loss, you’re saving him from a $260 loss.)

(SECOND NOTE: Don’t say “Would you take $250?” Nor “How does $250 sound?” You’re using statements here, not questions.)

Remember, you have an enormous advantage here. Once the show begins, your money will retain all of its value. The scalper’s tickets will lose 100% of theirs. At this moment the seats are filling and the last groupie backstage is putting her panties back on. Now, one of two things will happen.

1.    You’ve got a deal.
2.    You don’t.

In scenario 1, the scalper will cut the deal as soon as possible. Before you know it, he’ll have given you the tickets and walked off with your cash. He’ll do this for several reasons. One, time is money and he might have several other tickets to sell to someone else. And if he doesn’t, then that means his workday is now over and there’s no point lingering at the “office”.

In scenario 2, he’ll let you know that your offer is either a) insultingly low, which it could theoretically be if you didn’t do your homework on eBay and Craig’s List, or b) something he might take, but not before trying to squeeze you out of a few bucks more.

If it’s a), then you’ve got information that you didn’t have before. You’ll walk from this person and find another scalper, preferably out of sight of the first, and adjust your offer accordingly. If it’s b), he’ll provide a corroborating argument.

“Come on, this is costing me money. I can give them to you for $x.”

Is $x below your predetermined maximum? Stand firm anyway.

“$250 is the highest I can go.”

Be nonchalant and without saying as much, make it clear that you’d just as soon spend the night at the sports bar across the street than listen to Richie Sambora’s talkbox.

WALK AWAY. Which remains one of the smartest things you can do when a deal isn’t to your liking.

Give the scalper a few seconds to chase after you and accept your offer. (If it’s really that great of a deal, there’s a good chance another buyer will swoop in. So again, give the scalper a few seconds. Nothing more. If it really is a price you can live with, immediately return and bump your offer up. Splitting the difference can usually work here. But don’t get caught in the tango of incrementally converging on a price. Get it done in no more than 3 steps. His offer, your counteroffer, and whatever you agree on if it’s neither of the first two.

One more thing. Strategic cash locations:

Carry none of your ticket-buying money in your wallet.

Hundreds go in the front right pocket, front left if you’re lefthanded. Carry no more hundreds than it would take to cover your predetermined limit. Your self-imposed $330 “limit” can rapidly become $400 if the scalper sees too much green and “can’t make change.” They can always make change. Their lives are conducted in nothing but cash.

Twenties in the other front pocket.

Fives in the back. At least three of them. No tens.

That way, you’ve got enough to cover every possible five-dollar increment, and you don’t have to worry about showing more than you’re willing to pay.

You’re welcome. Now get out there, take advantage of a lowlife, and enjoy the show.

**This post is featured in the Carnival of of Wealth #38**

and

**The Totally Money Carnival #19: Oreo Edition**